I am catastrophically in love with you💞

Thu, 15 Aug 2019 17:55:29 +0800

tumblr will never die because we’re all too incoherent and petty to leave. someone will just pirate the source code and start running “tunglr” and we’ll all move over like the chucklefucks we are

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 15:50:22 +0800

evilkitten3:

someone introducing t’challa at an international conference: and now, his majesty, king of wakanda, t’challa!

shuri, somewhere in the crowd: NERD

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:14:55 +0800

romansleftshoulderpad:

No one admits is but everyone’s REAL favorite ship dynamic is just

Person A: Character you can project onto

Person B: Your type

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:14:42 +0800

pandavalkyrie:

pandavalkyrie:

Hi I live in Richmond VA and I love my city so much, this morning 60 people woke up to find old television sets just sitting on their porches or lawns. Even better, those with security cameras recorded the person(s) responsible and they cannot be identified because they were wearing a jumpsuit and tv on their head

A new local cryptid I’m so stoked

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:12:37 +0800

vourent:

The Old Man and The Sea (1999) dir. Russian animator Aleksandr Petrov

This beautiful little scene took an insane amount of work to create. Each and every frame of this movie is an oil painting on glass, a technique mastered by only a handful of animators in the world. By using his fingertips instead of a paintbrush on different glass sheets positioned on multiple levels, each covered with slow-drying oil paints, Petrov was able to add depth to his paintings. After photographing each frame painted on the glass sheets, which was four times larger than the usual A4-sized canvas, he had to slightly modify the painting for the next frame and so on. It took over two years to paint each of the 29,000+ frames.

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:10:44 +0800

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:10:04 +0800

hhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm:

death siblings

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:09:58 +0800

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:09:00 +0800

1989nihil:

awful-brew:

xxfangirlanonymousxx:

saxifraga-x-urbium:

baneismydragon:

celticpyro:

Now I want to get married just so I can do this.

If I were a billionaire I would absolutely tell my secretary to send wedding gifts to anyone who sent me an invite regardless of if I knew them, because- A. I know how expensive that nonsense is. B. I would be a billionaire and when else am I gonna do with that much money? Honestly… and C. I would totally make showing up at random weddings with crazy awesome gifts my new stress relief hobby. “Congratulations random strangers! I admire your daring and stratigic planning. Here’s that 700$ tea set you wanted but assumed no one would ever buy.”

Do you even have to be getting married

Are they gonna check

Damn it sure is

“we invited an eccentric billionaire to our fake wedding in the hopes of getting a free present, but then they said they would come and now we have to have an actual fake wedding for them to attend.”

movie plot right there

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:08:07 +0800

bookshelfdreams:

mrv3000:

tinyconfusion:

sometimes i think back on rose tyler being the companion to usher in dw to a new generation and she was portrayed by billie piper as a common girl with baggy clothes and messy hair and such uncommon beauty and i’m just like, wow rtd really did give us a wholly imperfect, utterly extraordinary companion and made her the actual hero of the show … the power

This was actually a huge draw for me when I first started watching it. The first thing that we saw was this person with realistic bedhead waking up in a realistically messy room, and I was like YES. It was completely different from the manicured Hollywood version of girls/women that I’ve always seen, and it was so refreshing.

What strikes me as most transgressive about her character is that she’s working class - unambiguously, unapologetically. She doesn’t just wake up in a messy room; she wakes up in a tiny bedroom that barely fits her bed. Her hair is not expertly coiffed, she did it herself with a shitty blow dryer in front of a bathroom mirror with bad lightning. Her clothes, make-up and jewelry scream “late 00′s lower class girl”; she doesn’t have the money to develop a refined taste, but makes do with what she can afford. In all her seasons, she always looks kinda trashy, in a way none of the other companions ever did.

And that’s something I don’t think I have ever seen before, at least not in this kind of fantasy/adventure show. Even if the characters tell us they’re struggling economically, they always have that vague aura of middle/upper class about them, that comes with having an expensive wardrobe, perfect make up, a nice apartment, etc. Rose is different; nothing about her, from her home to her workplace is even remotely glamorous.

Class is something that is so seldom addressed in fiction - when it isn’t the whole point of the story, anyway.

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:06:38 +0800

melonkollie:

today at work a toddler in a high chair patted me on the arm to get my attention, then when i crouched down and asked him what’s up, he pointed at the table full of chatty old ladies across the aisle and said “NOISE” and i have never in my life been more delighted by a guest complaint

Wed, 14 Aug 2019 08:06:02 +0800

deadaccount528258835:

roswell-newton-vargas:
roswell-newton-vargas:
I’ve worked with skulls and taxidermy for years, and my mother was a mortician, so death doesn’t yuck me out, but something about holding a skull and going, “Hm… there was a brain in this,” just slams me into an existential crisis at eighty-eight miles per hour.
Me, singing quietly while I gently scrape tissue off of teeth: I’m just meat! I’m just meat! I’m meat that has opinions and one day I’ll die!
Halmet (1603)

Sat, 11 Nov 2017 13:25:05 +0800

djscr4tch:

ifuhwordscouldsay:

riddleharry:

troyesivan:

asperfectasharmony:

whatthefunniest:

letters-from-the-skyy:

This makes me laugh so hard every time.

This moment ruined that entire movie for me because it absolutely destroyed the image of dumbledore

because he’s galloping?

WELL?!? DID YA?!?!

I will never not reblog this.

mariana-oconnor: laurathia: kat8noghosts: thefingerfuckingfemalefury: animatedamerican: zero0000...

Sat, 11 Nov 2017 13:23:56 +0800

mariana-oconnor:

laurathia:

kat8noghosts:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

animatedamerican:

zero0000:

dreadpiratemary:

septimusprime:

thesanityclause:

twelvemonkeyswere:

prongsmydeer:

The most hilarious thing about the fact Buckbeak had a trial and lost is that later on JKR resolves the issue by having Hagrid take him in again and renaming him Witherwings. That’s literally all it took. What if in POA, Hagrid simply said, “Sorry, Buckbeak flew away.”

“There’s a hippogriff right there, Hagrid.”

“A different hipprogriff.”

“I’m… pretty sure that’s the same hipprogriff.”

“Prove it.”

no dna tests we die like scientifically underdeveloped societies

Prisoner of Azkaban continues to be the most frustrating book

Someone should have just adopted Sirius and started calling him Gerald.

Remus: Erm… this is our new order member, my… cousin Gerald. Gerald White.

“Mr. Lupin that is Sirius Black with glasses!”
“Oh come now Minister, Sirius Black doesn’t wear glasses. That wouldn’t make sense.”
“Well have Mr. White take off his glasses then!”
“He can’t he needs them to see.”

it got better

It’s honestly a miracle to me that wizarding society doesn’t collapse every other week because like

You’ve got this world full of people who can destroy whole buildings or turn people into beetles or make vehicles fly just by waving a stick at them

And there is literally no common sense

Anywhere to be found
Voldemort would never have had anyone find out he was back if he just went around calling himself Steve

Okay, see, I thought I saved this post to comment on it but I’d like to bring up

The Minister would NEVER EVER disbelieve in Gerald White. He’d buy it hook line and sinker. The wizarding world would buy it hook line and sinker. The GOBLINS wouldn’t but wizards have been shown to be pretty blindingly clueless. Still, Gringotts would grudgingly give Sirius access to the Black fortune.

But, but, but, you know the one person

the one person

who Gerald White would drive AB-SO-LUTELY FUCKING BATSHIT?

Severus Snape.

Snape would do everything, EVERYTHING, to get people to believe that it’s Sirius. But the Order would ignore it (they accepted Sirius as Sirius before anyway) and Remus would just be so… so affronted.

‘Severus, he is my cousin.’

And Sirius would love it. He’d love the fact that Snape just hated it. He’d be the BEST DAMN GERALD WHITE EVER b/c Snape is doing everything from dropping veritaserum into his firewhisky to capturing a dementor in a box and releasing it on Sirius when he least expects it

That one causes problems for a bare minute because SHIT A DEMENTOR ATTEMPTED TO GIVE GERALD THE KISS MAYBE SNAPE IS RIGHT except Harry comes forward and is like ‘excuse me, I’ve never committed a crime and dementors are ALWAYS attacking me, I think they’re attracted to glasses’

and the magical community is like ‘shit, yeah, you’re right’

and just

Spare. Snape goes spare.

Picturing Snape as Mr. Crocker from the Fairly Oddparents now.

Gerald White eventually becomes a fully registered animagus. When he turns into his animagus form right in front of Snape, Snape’s bursting at the seams, just pointing at him and spluttering:

‘HE’S A BIG BLACK DOG! A DOG - THAT IS BLACK. SIRIUS BLACK. BLACK DOG DOG BLACK.’

And Remus calmly says: “That’s absurd, Severus. Sirius Black was never an animagus and besides which, people’s names don’t have any influence over their animagus forms or anything like that. That’s ridiculous.”

And Snape yells: “Shut it WEREWOLF MCWEREWOLF!”

Everyone looks at Remus, who blinks and sighs as Gerald White turns back into his human form.

“Pure coincidence,” Gerald says. “My aunt was into Roman mythology. Has to happen sometimes.” Then he pauses to give Snape an overly concerned look. “Are you alright, Severus? You’re looking a little red.”

dharmabeatdownblog: root: i love glitches like this Bethesda...

Sat, 11 Nov 2017 13:08:36 +0800

dharmabeatdownblog:

root:

i love glitches like this

Bethesda Savings and Loan

unpretty: ways i have tricked people into thinking i am competent: bought a really nice looking...

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 17:59:33 +0800

unpretty:

ways i have tricked people into thinking i am competent:

bought a really nice looking fountain pen

that sounds like a joke but fountain pens are cheap as shit and when you use one people look at you like you’re a fucking wizard

this hero 901 cost me $3 on ebay and i don’t know why people assume that this is a pen for intelligent people but they do

it works better when i am using a nice notebook and not the avengers notebook that makes it look like the hulk is grabbing my sweet pen

i write in code which for some reason leads everyone to assume that i am some kind of da vinci motherfucker, instead of the reality, which is that i am writing about dicks and don’t want anyone to know

it looks like i am constantly taking notes on everything which is both intimidating and inaccurate, just the way i like it

i bought a usb clicker/laser pointer for $11 and now it seems like i’ve got this shit on lock, like i am so pro at giving presentations i even own accessories

holding a clicker makes you seem at least 10% more like you know what you’re talking about i’m pretty sure

i check the weekly freebies on creativemarket every monday so now i have a huge folder of pro-looking website themes and powerpoint templates and fill-in-the-blank resumes (also a lot of autumnal clipart and watercolor flowers and script fonts but that is less relevant)

i bought a ceramic coffee mug at world market years ago and it makes me look like a productive coffee-drinker because no one knows it’s full of hot cocoa

i don’t know why drinking coffee makes you look busy it just does even though i’m pretty sure it statistically reduces productivity

bonus: not only does no one know i’m just drinking Depression Chocolate but they think i am being Environmentally Conscious rather than Poor As Shit

extra bonus: i can take a sip whenever it looks like someone is going to ask a question and then they ask someone else

i almost never have to answer questions and i leave the room a lot because i have to pee constantly so double extra bonus

“That’s a very good question, and one that deserves an in-depth answer, so if you’d like to leave me your card I’d be happy to discuss it with you later one-on-one” aka “how DARE you suggest i waste everyone’s time answering this question right now” aka “lmfao i have no fucking clue what you just said please let me secretly google that okay”

bonus: now it seems like you are a sophisticated grownup who assumes everyone has A Card and if they have to settle for writing their email on a scrap of paper you can feel smug about it even though in your heart you know that you are no better

i’ve got anxiety and poor impulse control and anxiety about my poor impulse control so i generally say jack shit about shit and this constant silence is often misinterpreted as aloof observation

no one knows that my air of mystery is actually a bad case of the shy and i am too shy to correct them so it works out

when i’m on my laptop and i don’t want anyone to notice how much i’m dicking around i turn the brightness way down so they can’t snoop without being obvious

at least one window of notepad++ with some random html page or css stylesheet in it makes randos assume you are some kind of genius doing some genius shit, unless they are CS major randos, in which case i guess find an intimidating looking excel spreadsheet and hope for the best

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 17:59:32 +0800

nightmares06:

emkayohh:

So… this is gonna happen in the next movie, right?
@mogadeer

spocksplum: deepfriedfuckpotato: quousque: advanced-procrastina...

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 17:59:31 +0800

spocksplum:

deepfriedfuckpotato:

quousque:

advanced-procrastination:

captainkirk94:

goldenpoc:

exomoon:

rexpinn:

emiria:

theradicalace:

tossingtelevisions:

Bitch WHAT THE FUCK

what the FUCK

???!!!!??

Yo, this guy sold his soul for this or something holy fuck

i feel like i just watched something forbidden for mortal eyes

I’m the black lady in the audience LIKE DAMN OKAY

So….do i go to church tommorrow or stay in?

MAGIC TRICKS ARE SIMPLY SLEIGHT OF HAND, USING REDIRECTION TO TAKE YOUR FOCUS OFF THE THING THEYRE MANIPULATING. THAT IS NOT THIS. IT SEEMS LIKE IT AT FIRST BUT THEN HE STARTS DOING THIS SHIT IN PLAIN SIGHT, AND LETTING US ACTUALLY SEE THE SHIT TRANSFORMING AND CHANGING PLACES. THIS ISN’T SLEIGHT OF HAND.

THIS ISN’T A MAGIC TRICK. ITS JUST FUCKING MAGIC.

???? what??? the fuck???????

“Oh, I think I see the moments there where the actual transfer is happening, but he’s really good at it,” I thought at first.

Promptly followed by, “Wait what the fuck what the FUCK”

Mmm bruh this guy needs to be arrested by wizard police for violation of the statute of secrecy

"Maybe we feel empty because we leave pieces of ourselves in everything we used to love."

Thu, 28 Sep 2017 18:52:22 +0800

“Maybe we feel empty because we leave pieces of ourselves in everything we used to love.”

- R.M. drake
(via thelovejournals)

rm-renfield:any vampires who need permission 2 enter my house….. u have my permission…. u wanna...

Thu, 28 Sep 2017 16:51:21 +0800

rm-renfield:

any vampires who need permission 2 enter my house….. u have my permission…. u wanna come through my window in a flurry of fog & wind? u can do that….. wanna drink my blood & take me away to ur big vampire castle? alright friend, go for it